Chapter 20 of 35 · Book 3, The Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook

Chapter 20 — Planet Beautiful

Book: The Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook · Previous: Chapter 19 — Frank Q at the bar · Next: Chapter 21 — Brynhild's Daughters · Floor: Floor 4 — The Iron Tangle · Series: the series

Opening

The production trailer was a submarine, not a boat.

Summary

Zev delays the show herself: Carl's talk with Frank and 'Donut's amazing lap dance' were the top two feeds in the universe. Donut has The Sledge in her chat and reads Frank as a man who has given up; Carl: 'Those are the ones we need to worry about the most.' The production trailer is a submarine, a deluxe security rental with a floodlit seabed outside the picture window (Carl tells Donut about Unsinkable Sam), and Carl's interface still works: Mexx-6000 explains that Borant built a cheap dual-layer planetary zone to sea level with no admin bubble — 'built this entire crawl with spit and duct tape' Planet Beautiful is a sound booth and a teleprompter. Donut narrates pet shows off-script (the real story of the cocker spaniel at Crufts); Carl's beauty-pageant script, written by an AI consultant that half-read Earth's media, is Chad-class males, 'roasties' and a clip of him eating an Arby's sandwich. He refuses. Bin, the grey producer, started the show alone to record cultures being erased and is now being squeezed by Titan for ratings; Carl reads the video-arcade script instead.

Back in the green room: Chris killed Frank at the bar and walked out, banned. Carl rereads Brandon's message. Donut already knows about the coupons — Imani is a gossip — and buried Carl's under a track and threw Katia's in the garbage at Hotdog on a Stick; 'a subject I'd rather not talk about.' Carl steals the self-cooling shelves (the Cookbook has recipes that need cold), the makeup table, the couch and the cat treats. Bautista: the Kravyad died, the portal closed, 150 without hats, fifty kilometres to the abyss on foot. Carl's parting screenshot through the portal home shows the personal space full of thirty women — Hekla among them, in the training room with Katia. 'Motherfucker'

Characters

• Carl — Refuses the pageant script; steals the furniture; sees the Daughters in his house.
• Princess Donut — Off script on Crufts; 'the Princess Posse'; the coupons are gone.
• Zev — Delays the show for ratings; names the fans.
• Bin the producer — Producer of Planet Beautiful, a grey; squeezed by Titan.
• Chris — Killed Frank Q and walked out of the club.
• Hekla — In the Royal Palace with thirty Daughters.
• Daniel Bautista — The Kravyad dead; 150 hatless; walking to the abyss.

Locations

• Production trailers — A submarine on the seabed; a real studio with sound booths.
• The Royal Palace of Princess Donut — Seen through a portal: full of Daughters.

Motifs

• Entertainment as machinery — An AI's Earth; a producer who wanted to record the erased; Titan's ratings.
• The show — Planet Beautiful; the top two feeds; Borant's spit-and-duct-tape zone.
• Meadow Lark (party) — Chris kills the man who hurt Carl.
• The Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook — Recipes that need cold; the shelves come home.