Chapter 34 of 89 · Book 7, This Inevitable Ruin

Chapter 34 — The king's message; Rosetta's whip

Book: This Inevitable Ruin · Part: The Ramp-Up · Previous: Chapter 33 — Parlay · Next: Chapter 35 — Volteeg; the dwarves' tunnel · Floor: Floor 9 — Faction Wars · Series: the series

Opening

I moved to send a quick message to Donut before I realized the no-chat-in-the-bubble rule

Summary

Rust is crying with rage, grief and laughter at once, shaking his fists at a false sky, and Carl thinks of Stockade's insanity; the adjutants withdraw to watch a video on a tablet that Victory then drops in the dirt. 'Do you have any children, human?' 'I have three, and all three are idiots.' The third, Princess Formidable, 'the one you need to worry about': she has taken one of his cruisers with a detachment of marines, is five hours from the monitor station orbiting Venus, and has told the whole Syndicate she will board it and trip the failsafe by hand — because she believes, on a Nebular theory every analyst rejects, that this AI's insanity is contagious and will infect the centre system. Carl laughs. 'The Skull Empire has never engaged in subterfuge.' The station's security explodes on intrusion; the Skull Empire builds the satellites and builds backdoors into everything it makes, a secret until she broadcast it — 'that stock certificate you own, Carl, is losing significant value by the moment.' The AI cannot stop her: the tunnel gate's controller must orbit the game planet, and the station is staged out of zone. Rust's verdict on the war: they have the Posse beaten now or later, Stalwart has assembled the largest force of war mages ever, and the only creature in the universe he fears is Architect Houston, who is using this season's rules to open his full arsenal. He came to die with honour and cast the shadow himself rather than his children; he respects Carl. His ask: a message to Formidable on behalf of the people of Earth, who has 'always had a soft heart for the seeds'. Carl, thinking of the gas station and Lightning Lou, plays it straight — sacrificing the surface to kill every warlord and start a galactic war 'doesn't seem like a bad tradeoff' — and trades: the horde withdraws unharassed, the leaders get their hours to write their farewells. Rust walks away without a word. Zev confirms it: five hours, half the fleet chasing her, the other half shooting each other. Carl to Donut in chat: don't react; the failsafe will not fire, because he disconnected it on Christmas morning; the AI's sphere on his map has just taken Uranus. 'Call it a hunch.' 'That's a pretty big hunch, Carl.' The plan is to hit them from behind as they retreat, and the reprieve seems too good — and then Rosetta rises out of the dirt in a tech cloak, flips onto Gonk behind the king, loops a whip round his neck and pulls. The head goes like a champagne cork. Five seconds of silence across the field. Tens of thousands charge.

Characters

• King Rust — Weeping on his yak; a father with a message; beheaded by a whip.
• Rosetta Thagra — Out of the ground in a cloak; a whip; a king's head in the dirt.
• Princess Formidable — Five hours from Venus with a stolen cruiser and a backdoor.
• Carl — Laughs at the end of the world; knows the fuse is dead; bargains for hours.
• Princess Donut — 'Does that mean we're all about to die? […] Mongo is all alone!'
• Baroness Victory — Watches the video; drops the tablet; is patted on the waist by a judge.
• Architect Houston — The one creature a king fears.
• Zev — 'It is pure chaos.'
• The System AI — Its sphere past Uranus; the station staged out of its reach.

Locations

• The FUPA — The field between two armies, inside a bubble.

Motifs

• The failsafe — A princess with a backdoor, and a button Carl already cut the wire on.
• The Skull Empire — Backdoors in everything they build; a king who came to die well.
• The Nebulars — The contagion theory, 'crackpot', driving a princess to the button.
• Carl's family — His father in a bed, blind to himself; a king who knows.