Chapter 11 of 35 · Book 3, The Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook

Chapter 11 — Gore-Gore

Book: The Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook · Previous: Chapter 10 — Landmines on the ochre line · Next: Chapter 12 — The Dismemberment Limited · Floor: Floor 4 — The Iron Tangle · Series: the series

Opening

Even from the top of the stairs, the detonation was deafening.

Summary

The derailment works: the engine on its side, car two peeled open, the platform sign flattened, dead tentacle wolves and knife-wielding skunk fairies on the tiles, and Locomotive Breath! with its warning about unforeseen domino effects. Level 29. The engineer climbs out: Gore-Gore, a ManTauR — a man's body with a second torso where the neck should be, four arms, blue Braveheart paint, a 'Welcome to the Gun Show' tank top — level 40, an adherent of Grull, who takes them for fellow passengers and, hailing Princess Donut, explains the end of the line: employees get off at 435 and take a memory-wiping portal run by the Kravyad; engineers drive through the abyss gate and wake at the depot with only the engine car, which is not deep-cleaned; passengers who ride the gate in the other cars fare badly: 'Sometimes there are bones.' Ride in car one and you would live — 'But I would be honor-bound to slay you!' Engineers never leave the car unless the train crashes. Donut's idea: get a key, jump ahead on a loop train, catch a train that was already past the wreck.

Then Gore-Gore bursts out of Club Vanquisher — 'Vile traitors! Saboteurs!' — as the ram-headed cleric peeks out and waves; he told him, Donut guesses. Boss battle: magic missiles bounce, Hole is an inch deep, Fear barely lands, part of Katia's arm spins away — only metal, Carl thinks — and every punch of the Grull gauntlet adds 1.5% to a counter on Carl's screen: 3.0, 4.5 … 10.5. Protective Shell hurls Gore-Gore down the stairs with Carl still in his grip; ribs and an arm break and heal. At 20% health, standing on the tracks under two cars crushed into a teepee, Gore-Gore says 'I have been blessed by the gods' and a ten-second timer appears over his head. Carl drop-kicks him with Talon Strike onto the third rail and takes the shock through the grounding. Winner. 'That wasn't very fun.' And a notice: sponsored — by the Valtay Corporation.

Characters

• Carl — Crashes a train; summons a god at 10.5% and kills the vessel with a drop kick; sponsored by the Valtay.
• Gore-Gore — Ochre line engineer, ManTauR, level 40; explains the abyss gate; electrocuted.
• Princess Donut — Gets the engineer talking; the jump-ahead plan; pulls Carl off the track.
• Katia Grim — Blocks a blade with her arm and loses part of it.
• Mongo — Backhanded to near death by one blow.

Locations

• The Iron Tangle — A platform buried under three crashed trains. The abyss gate after 435; the employee portal and the Kravyad; the depot at station 10.
• Club Vanquisher — The cleric who peeks out and waves; Donut thinks he told Gore-Gore.

Motifs

• The gods — The gauntlet's chance is cumulative; a war-god summoning begun and killed at ten seconds.
• The Valtay Corporation — Carl's first sponsor.
• Achievements — Locomotive Breath!
• Explosives — The first derailment.