Chapter 11 of 74 · Book 6, The Eye of the Bedlam Bride

Chapter 11 — Asojano

Book: The Eye of the Bedlam Bride · Part: Havana · Previous: Chapter 10 — Pueblo de los Olvidados · Next: Chapter 12 — Shadow Boxer · Floor: Floor 8 — The Ghosts of Earth · Series: the series

Opening

» You invited a red-tagged NPC boss into a saferoom, and he actually managed to get inside

Summary

Interloper!: a red-tagged boss in a saferoom, a bronze Stranger Danger box. He is Asojano, Orisha, Level 130 City Boss, non-corporeal, the Lord of Smallpox — a former god made flesh at the rise of the Ascendency who faded beyond the veil as his worshippers went extinct, and came back to this small town only to look at what he had lost; 'disease incarnate. He kills, and he heals'; a reed hat he bumps into things in. Bone-white, a straw skirt and headdress, fire flecking off his feet, a reed-and-seashell wand that will not work ('like he was trying to get a remote control with a dead battery to work'), a corpse stench that doubles when the door shuts, a moss-coloured aura, and a health bar sinking on its own. 'You must assist me': he is trapped, his presence has plagued the spirits, and only a priest may speak to him — 'I will have your crops withering.' 'Carl does that all on his own.' The quest updates: an Orisha is the source; repair his shrine in the temple at the town's centre (a Club Vanquisher, which Sister Ines refuses to enter), or kill him, or kill everybody. Come tonight, when his power is greater and so is theirs. Anton, flag in hand, waits for five per cent; Sister Ines, kneading her head, eyes shut, breaks: 'You are a false god […] Our souls can't handle this […] No more false gods. Not again.' Asojano steps out and his health rises. In the personal space: Mordecai with chocolate on his face, Bomo playing Smash on a GameCube with an adapter Mordecai built, Dorito confetti, a cleaner bot in a rage. Boxes: a joke tube of mace; a very rare consumable snare, Hobbled, cutting a totem's time by ninety per cent; and Donut's fan box, voted by the Posse — The Bard's Golden Throat, a real amethyst headset microphone that autotunes within a step and a half and amplifies to five times ('You sound like T-Pain'; 'The real Britney, not the crawler'). Carl's fan box: a massage coupon for the Penis Palace back room, plus one companion. Katia, Bautista and Louis visit: Louis hollow since Firas; Britney unhealed but levelling fast alone (not, Donut hopes, 'on the path to being a super villain'); Tran resilient; Iceland's squad with Hekla's last daughters; Bautista's tea; Ren was a runway model in Paris, injured by an ex, and her party may join the guild ('Carl, Mongo, Bomo, Mordecai, and I all vote no'); Samantha writes YOOHOO fifty times to Louis and asks what he is wearing. Katia's trolls, the Lads, drop cards by the hundred: two Flee cards, Blue Stuff, Greased Lightning; Li Na has a mystic that halves draw time. Zev calls them to the show.

Characters

• Asojano — The Lord of Smallpox, a faded god in a reed hat, trapped in a cemetery town.
• Sister Ines — 'No more false gods. Not again.'
• Paz Lo — The priest a god will speak through; 'Uh.'
• Anton Lopez — A flag ready for five per cent; a hand on the sister's shoulder.
• Princess Donut — A Golden Throat from her fans; 'Just because you're undead doesn't mean you shouldn't use deodorant.'
• Carl — A massage coupon; 'It's not our place to judge her.'
• Mordecai — Chocolate on his face; a party he will not explain.
• Katia Grim — Cards from the Lads; a guild vote.
• Louis and Firas — Louis, hollow; Samantha's crush.
• Daniel Bautista — Tea, and Tran's resilience.
• Bomo — Smash on the GameCube; a reluctant brush.
• Tserendolgor — A Paris runway model, once; a guild candidate.

Locations

• The Colón cemetery — The Yellow Zone with a god in it; a shrine to repair tonight.
• The Royal Palace of Princess Donut — Candy wrappers, a cleaner bot, a GameCube.

Motifs

• The orishas — Former gods who faded when their worshippers did; power lingering in shells.
• The gods — A god who may only be addressed through a priest; a nun who cannot bear it.
• Donut's songs — Autotune as the century's greatest invention.
• The Princess Posse — Fans vote on prizes: a microphone and a massage.
• T'Ghee totems — Hobbled; Flee; Blue Stuff; Greased Lightning; a mystic that speeds the draw.
• Loneliness — Louis after Firas; Britney's fast levels.