Chapter 2 of 78 · Book 5, The Butcher's Masquerade

Chapter 2 — Night weasels

Book: The Butcher's Masquerade · Part: The Hunt · Previous: Chapter 1 — The vice principal's office · Next: Chapter 3 — Quasar · Floor: Floor 6 — The Hunting Grounds · Series: the series

Opening

I left through the same door I entered, and I stepped into the pouring rain.

Summary

Out of the booth into pouring rain and a jungle of kite-sized leaves — the Selva — and a port-a-potty that is the bathroom door. A bamboo wall, and two Funeral Bells: tall, thin mushroom men with white-painted faces, level 95, the humourless day-and-night guards of the sixth floor's smaller settlements. Inside is a medium dryad settlement, a German village of treehouses with a Club Vanquisher spire, the kind of forest Carl once dreamed of working in as a park ranger. Then both guards tip over, paralysed. Something invisible sparks against his Protective Shell; a thrown sack of gunpowder gives it a shape; his new Ping spell lights every non-mob in range; a second one bites him from behind and he goes down, paralysed for five minutes, unable to heal or call for help. Donut's magic missiles cook the gunpowder off the first: a six-legged, jet-black ferret with too many teeth. Tootsie, Night Weasel Scout, level 25, a pet of Hunter Zabit — a gang of about twenty invisible weasels, scouts that can smell prey hundreds of kilometres away and paralyse it, then the huntsmen. Chris's lava-rock foot crushes it an inch from Carl's nose; Chris carries him, burning, into the saferoom pub while Donut raises a dead weasel and triplicates it against the rest. 'They were hunting you, Carl […] They were just the first.'

On the couch, paralysed, Carl is climbed by a fuzzy, buck-toothed, knee-high teddy bear with elf ears and a monkey tail: Mordecai, a Pocket Kuma, level 50, a half-fairy court pet King Finian ordered executed when they turned out to be intelligent — 'They can't fight for shit. They can barely walk. But holy shit are they disgustingly cute.' Carl laughs until he cries; Mordecai cannot reach his own doorknob. Then a knock on the personal space's door. 'Collateral'

Characters

• Carl — Paralysed by an invisible weasel; carried in by Chris; laughs at his manager.
• Princess Donut — Magic missiles make the invisible visible; 'I'm small and adorable, and I just saved your life.'
• Chris — Crushes the weasel and carries Carl in over a burning shoulder.
• Katia Grim — 'They were hunting you, Carl […] They were just the first.'
• Mongo — Chomps the second weasel.
• Mordecai — A Pocket Kuma: a fuzzy half-fairy bear too small to open his door.
• Zabit — Named on his pet's card: the master of a night-weasel gang.

Locations

• The Selva — The jungle outside the booth: rain, drums of water, the scent of flowers.
• The dryad settlement — A German village of treehouses behind a bamboo wall; Die Kirschbomben.
• Safe rooms — A pub where a tree-like creature watches; the personal space through its door.
• The Royal Palace of Princess Donut — A couch to be paralysed on; a door too high for a kuma.

Motifs

• The hunters — The first pets: a night-weasel gang that hunts by smell from hundreds of kilometres.
• The Funeral Bells — Mushroom guards, level 95, paralysed like anyone else.
• Race and class — A manager reduced to a court pet; Ping.
• Explosives — A pillowcase of gunpowder as a way to see.