Character · Book 5, The Butcher's Masquerade

The Sledge

One of two level-35 rock cretins in tuxedos hired as the party's bodyguards at the Desperado Club on the fourth floor, 'about as intelligent as one would expect from someone named Bomo and The Sledge': he dances with Donut on his shoulders, buys her a protection spell with his own money, and ends up in her chat.

Segment appearances

• Chapter 3 — Quasar
• Chapter 4 — Golden Throat
• Chapter 5 — Zockau
• Chapter 10 — No dinosaurs of any kind
• Chapter 17 — The security checkpoint
• Chapter 21 — CrawlCon
• Chapter 35 — Ballroom Blitz
• Chapter 37 — The rainbow bridge
• Chapter 46 — Sierra
• Chapter 50 — Uncle Morty's Insta Lawn-Kill
• Chapter 52 — Gehenna Bramble
• Chapter 54 — The blood bar
• Chapter 58 — The last stall in the women's bathroom
• Chapter 63 — Enchanted Hammer of Fast Forward
• Chapter 64 — The attendant entrance
• Chapter 66 — The Sugar Cube
• Chapter 67 — Slate Butterflies
• Chapter 70 — Anaconda
• Chapter 72 — Cat-nac the Magnificent
• Chapter 73 — Wonderwall, again
• Chapter 74 — All Eyes on Me
• Chapter 75 — Sic 'em

Arc

One of four cretins delivered as collateral, holding Zerzura (ch. 3), locked in with a Frogger cabinet and then banned from it (ch. 4, ch. 10); a Grand Theft Auto tutor to changeling children (ch. 63). His job is the last day: lead half the changelings into the castle from below (ch. 67), then, when the mantises come, from above (ch. 70). He ends on the roof with a controller, Bonnie, Prudence and two cubs, crashes the Twister into the last two towers 'like helicopter in game GTA' (ch. 72, ch. 73), loses Prudence, is freed by changelings disguised as mantises (ch. 73), and casts the spell — one minute to chant, five to cast — that takes the castle and everyone in it to the ninth floor (ch. 74). 'Surviving is winning, Louis. Everything else is bullshit' (ch. 73). 'Five seconds. Good-bye' (ch. 75).