Chapter 31 of 35 · Book 4, The Gate of the Feral Gods

Chapter 31 — Emberus, summoned

Book: The Gate of the Feral Gods · Previous: Chapter 30 — Get Orthrus · Next: Chapter 32 — Acolyte of Emberus · Floor: Floor 5 — The Bubbles · Series: the series

Opening

» Tran: I have him on my chat!

Summary

Quan Ch, through Tran: 'it's too good of a prize. Plus, if I get that fucking cat in the process it'd be a bonus.' Mordecai answers a frantic question with 'Yes', and Carl combines Mordecai's Special Brew with a potion ball in his inventory. Quan, level 48, has a shield — probably a level-15 Shield spell, presumably from his celestial robe, Carl guesses — that shrugs off Donut's missile; he preys on the weak and runs from danger. Carl locks the gyroscope, climbs out onto the lower wing beside the propeller, and throws the Hobgoblin Disco Ball: its residue clings to the shield, the rainbow smoke blinds him, Donut empties the tail gun and a double missile into the cloud, and a remote-detonated hob-lobber twenty feet short sends him falling like a comet. Orthrus is healed to 70%. A fish-shaped dirigible fires two harpoons short, and the puppy crushes it without noticing. Emberus, from behind: a horn on the left, the right side caved like Ruby's head, a body of fire curls, pounding on bubble 18 — level 250, invulnerable, 'a locked god', youngest brother of Taranis and half the sun duology with his twin Hellik, who wants both brothers dead; 'one of the most unhinged of all the pantheon', blind since his favourite son was murdered by an unknown assailant. Fifteen crawlers on the Lacuna floor throw fireballs at the dog. Then Quan, recovered, drops Orthrus to 2% and Unconscious from behind.

Carl dives the plane, gives Donut the stick ('Thumbs, Carl! Thumbs!'), and from the wing hurls the potion ball: the puppy glows, healed and invulnerable for thirty seconds, at the instant Quan fires. Donut loops the plane twice; something falls off the rudder; Carl claws back into the cockpit with Sticky Feet and can only turn a barrel roll into a death spiral. The nuclear option: he opens the god tab, chooses Emberus over Grull, waves away the wall of text, stands on the top wing with Donut clawed to his back, and throws the Skull Empire's Celestial Grenade at Quan, who freezes it in mid-air with a new red spell. It makes no difference. Emberus is summoned as a city-sized floating head with a second screaming mouth on his cheek and blood raining from empty sockets; the Drop Bear explodes on his nose; Carl has Divine Intervention, Donut does not. 'Orthrus. There you are. I've been looking for you. I was so very worried.' Both blink away before the sixty seconds end. Carl lands unhurt in the Soulless Prophet's land quadrant, Donut at 5% and singed black by the god's heat.

Quan, who cannot see the buff, hits him from behind while Carl is still invulnerable; Carl punches him, the buff running out as Quan's knife explodes in his hand, slams his face into a rock ('You're a bully and nobody likes you'), ignores a voice saying he is not the enemy, and, as Quan rockets away to the stairwell, is left holding his whole arm, three rings on its fingers. 'Tell him that was just a deposit.' Get Orthrus fails for everyone — 'all safe rooms will only serve monkey soup and saltine crackers' — and The Dumber of the Flunkies completes: the puppy is on the twelfth floor, 'Nun-defiling is back on the menu!' Two glowing sun tattoos on the backs of Carl's hands. Carl tells Imani to start. Donut, silent since the jump: 'I think you're crazy […] Straitjacket crazy.' He holds her and she purrs.

Characters

• Carl — On the wing three times; worships a god to summon him at an enemy; tears off an arm; sun tattoos.
• Princess Donut — Flies a biplane with paws; the tail gun; singed to 5%; 'Straitjacket crazy.'
• Mordecai — 'Yes.'
• Quan Ch — Attacks the puppy twice and Carl once; loses an arm and three rings; flees down the stairs.
• Orthrus — Unconscious at 2%, saved by a thrown potion, gone to the twelfth floor.
• Emberus — A locked god, blind, unhinged; summoned as a bleeding head; 'I was so very worried.'
• Tran — Quan's go-between.
• Imani — Told to begin.
• Mongo — Explores a burned world.

Locations

• The Lacuna — A fish dirigible crushed; fifteen crawlers on its floor.
• The Bubbles — The Soulless Prophet's land quadrant, hot and empty, its stairwell a spotlight.

Motifs

• The gods — Emberus's card; worship taken as a weapon; Hellik's hatred; Taranis.
• The Skull Empire — The Maestro's grenade used to save its target.
• Explosives — A disco ball on a shield; a remote detonation from a wing.
• Quests — Get Orthrus failed by everyone; monkey soup.
• The count — 'Might as well get started.'
• Staying human — 'Stop. He's not the enemy.' 'Fuck you'
• Carl's bare feet — Sticky Feet on a looping wing; Talon Strike on Quan.