Character · from book 4
Samantha
Psamathe, a minor deity banished to the Nothing by her father for bearing a king's child, half of whom escaped into the nearest naiad vessel — a sex doll of the fictional bard Lika — and now lives as a talking, immobile, latex head with fangs, a barrette reading 'Wet for you', and one refrain: 'I'm going to kill your mother.' Hired as the personal space's trainer. Her child is a sand ooze; her mother is a god.
Race and class, since book 5: Half-naiad
First appears: Book 4
Series arc
As of book 6. Psamathe, a minor goddess in a sex doll's head, hired as a trainer in book 4, a guided missile and a spy in book 5, and in book 6 a spider's best friend: Shi Maria eats her in the first chapters and lets her plan. She dates a badger, carries him around a demon's rampage by the arm stuck in her neck, lets Minge out of the Nothing by walking into a casino, flies, glows and fizzles, teleports a beach when asked for one nun, and takes a goddess's pickaxe without a mark. She confesses that she enhances spells she cannot control and calls herself a fraud; Carl tells her she is part of the team. After Elle's hail she mutters about a four seasons path, a tree and someone's mother; Amayon knows who she really is. Carl rides inside her to the fire and is dumped for her king. Her cousin's mother's empty body is still in his inventory; 'Find a Pulpmancer' is still open.
Open threads
Status is open or resolved; the chapter after it is the last one that moved the thread.
| Thread | Opened | Status |
|---|---|---|
| A goddess's head in the training room | B4 ch. 24 | open · B6 ch. 57 — 'I'm a fraud': she enhances spells she cannot control. Amayon knows who she really is (ch. 69); after Elle's hail she mutters about a four seasons path and a tree (ch. 65). See the book-6 thread on what she is becoming. |
| What Signet left: two living tattoos and her mother's body | B5 ch. 75 | open · B6 ch. 26 — Princess Lunette's body is put on the asphalt for a spider who cannot fill it; the golem goes back into Carl's inventory. 'Find a Pulpmancer' stands. |
| What Samantha is becoming | B6 ch. 65 | open — Stronger the longer a floor runs and, Carl guesses, with every death; of Elle, 'She's on the four seasons path'; of herself, 'I am stronger too'; and 'a path through the river, the water, and the tree, the earth'; Amayon: 'I know who you really are'; her body waits on a pulpmancer under Larracos. |
All threads: Open threads.
Through book 4
Half of a banished goddess in a sex doll's head, ejected from Carl's inventory when a spell breaks (B4 ch. 24): Psamathe talked Ghazi into opening the Nothing; her ooze is her child by a king; Mongo's knock stopped her waking as a full deity. Hired as the trainer, she helps with the yam, explains Emberus and Orthrus, and is thrown fifty kilometres to draw off a demon of the Nothing's harem, whom her own mother tears in two (B4 ch. 28, B4 ch. 32, B4 ch. 34). 'I'm going to kill your mother.'
Through book 5
A guided missile with a doll's face (B5 ch. 22), a spy in a palace's vents (B5 ch. 26), a torture victim on Vrah's back (B5 ch. 34), and the cousin of an elite who could give her a body (B5 ch. 25). At the party she finds the secret notes (B5 ch. 72), works the castle's security room from the cat tunnels, holds a door against a birthing god, and bites the soul crystals (B5 ch. 73); she surfs into the ballroom on gore and bites Vrah (B5 ch. 75). Her cousin is gone, and from the Nothing that takes her a voice shrieks 'Psamathe, we are coming' (B5 ch. 74); the cousin's mother's empty body is in Carl's inventory, to be finished by a Pulpmancer. She rockets away before the castle leaves.
Open: the body; where she went; her lore on Diwata, Eileithyia and the Vinegar Bitch (B5 ch. 62).
Through book 6
Eaten by a spider and made its best friend (B6 ch. 8, B6 ch. 26); dating a badger and carrying him around a demon's rampage by the arm stuck in her neck (B6 ch. 31–B6 ch. 33); the one who lets Minge out of the Nothing by walking into a casino (B6 ch. 32). She flies, glows and fizzles, teleports a beach when asked for one nun, takes a goddess's pickaxe without a mark (B6 ch. 29, B6 ch. 55, B6 ch. 66), and confesses that she enhances spells she cannot control and is 'a fraud' — 'You're part of the team' (B6 ch. 57). After Elle's hail she mutters about a four seasons path and a tree and someone's mother (B6 ch. 65); Amayon knows who she really is (B6 ch. 69). She carries automatons and Carl inside her and dumps him for her king (B6 ch. 57, B6 ch. 69, B6 ch. 72).
In the pantheon
Psamathe (Samantha) — a minor deity; banished. Listed with the rest of the pantheon on the pantheon page.
Family and enemies
| Relation | With | Source |
|---|---|---|
| child-of | Psamathe's mother | B4 ch. 34 |
| banished-by | her father | B4 ch. 24 |
| parent-of | the sand ooze | B4 ch. 24 |
| consort-of | an ancient king | B4 ch. 34 |
| kin-of | Emberus | B4 ch. 28 |
| impersonated-by (reversed) | Yarilo | B4 ch. 21 |
| kin-of | Signet | B5 ch. 25 |
| knows (reversed) | Amayon | B6 ch. 69 |
Where they appear
| Book | Chapters they are in (of the book's) | Where |
|---|---|---|
| 4 — The Gate of the Feral Gods | 7/35 | Ch. 21, Ch. 22, Ch. 23, Ch. 24, Ch. 28, Ch. 32, Ch. 34 · the book's own page |
| 5 — The Butcher's Masquerade | 34/78 | 8, 13, 17, 21–30, 34–35, 37, 39, 44, 50, 55–56, 60–64, 66, 70–76 · the book's own page |
| 6 — The Eye of the Bedlam Bride | 45/74 | 2–4, 8–9, 11, 17, 19–20, 22, 24–35, 40, 47–48, 53–72 · the book's own page |
By book
Samantha in book 4 — The Gate of the Feral Gods
A head
Ejected from Carl's inventory when the crystal spell breaks: a latex sex-doll head with fangs, a chipped chin, white hair and a barrette reading 'Wet for you', possessed by the Withering Spirit of Psamathe — a minor deity banished by her father for bearing a king's child, half of whom fled into the nearest naiad vessel on her first escape and has lived in Lika ever since (ch. 24). Katia works out the rest: she talked Ghazi into opening the Nothing, her other half and her ooze-child came through, the crystallisation trapped her, and everyone thought she was in the ghost. Mongo's knock made her a head instead of a full-powered deity.
The trainer
Carl tunes her jaw until the words come — 'I'm going to kill your mother' — names her Samantha, and Donut hires her as the personal space's trainer so she cannot summon a god by leaving (ch. 24). She helps Mordecai with the yam (ch. 32), explains Emberus and Orthrus ('A puppy! He's a really good boy') (ch. 28), and when a demon of the Nothing's harem comes for her, is fired fifty kilometres on a custom xistera attachment; the god who tears Slit in two is her mother (ch. 34). 'That was my kill!' The harem all hate her; Gash is the one to watch.
Samantha in book 5 — The Butcher's Masquerade
The guided missile
Samantha learns that Signet is her cousin and can give her a body (ch. 17) and spends the floor demanding it. Carl duct-tapes two seeking missiles to her and throws her; she comes back with an ankle (ch. 22). She goes into a river with an alarm trap playing Wonderwall taped to her head (ch. 25), into the vents (ch. 26), is swallowed twice (ch. 27), scouts across the river with a feather in her mouth (ch. 28), is tortured on Vrah's back (ch. 34), thrown like a rocket (ch. 37), used as a football by cubs (ch. 55) and rolled at an anti-air gun (ch. 61). Goddess of unrequited love, she says (ch. 26); she names a beaver god in the Nothing and a god who wears him (ch. 24), slanders Pawna (ch. 23) and knows what Diwata is (ch. 62, ch. 70).
The security room
Nobody goes to the bathroom that much: she finds the secret notes and signs them Psamathe (ch. 72). In the cat tunnels she finds the guards already beheaded, pulls the right-hand crystals so Ballroom A can cast again, shoves the left-hand ones back to disarm the hunters, holds a door against a birthing god ('SUCK IT, BITCH'), and when the door breaks, bites down on the soul crystals and blows out the third floor (ch. 73). She surfs into the ballroom on a wave of bug gore, bites the dying Vrah — 'Remember me, bitch!' — learns that her cousin is gone, and rockets away through a hole in the floor before the castle leaves (ch. 75). The empty body of Signet's mother is in Carl's inventory for her.
Samantha in book 6 — The Eye of the Bedlam Bride
MaeMae's friend
Samantha is swallowed by a spider and spends weeks in its stomach, planning a bachelorette party with matching shirts and a torrid affair with Louis (ch. 8, ch. 26). The spider becomes her best friend and promises her a body; she believes it. She drinks dirty Shirleys, dates a badger bartender to third base, carries him through a demon's rampage with his arm stuck in her neck, and watches him torn in half (ch. 31–ch. 33); she lets Minge out of the Nothing by wandering into a casino (ch. 32).
What she can do
She floats, then flies; she glows like a small sun and fizzles (ch. 29); she teleports an entire beach when asked to bring back one nun (ch. 55); a goddess's pickaxe bounces off her (ch. 66). Made to confess, she says she enhances spells and cannot control it, cannot teleport, reached the swamp by sticking to a train, and is 'useless' and 'a fraud' — and is told she is part of the team (ch. 57). After Elle's hail she mutters about the four seasons path, the tree and the river, and someone's mother to kill (ch. 65). Amayon knows who she really is (ch. 69).
The carnival ride
She carries spider automatons inside her for Carl's teleports (ch. 57), carries Carl himself a foot off the ground between a demon's legs (ch. 68), and has him land head-first inside her for twenty seconds of acid — 'the second weirdest sex I ever had' (ch. 69). She breaks up with him afterwards to go back to her king (ch. 72). 'We need to go clubbing more often!'