Chapter 71 of 99 · Book 8, A Parade of Horribles

Chapter 71 — Hungry Eyes: the goodbye; Bautista's tea

Book: A Parade of Horribles · Part: Horrible One · Previous: Chapter 70 — The memorial crystal; the Midnight Epicure · Next: Chapter 72 — Have You Ever Seen the Rain; Minus unmasked · Floor: Floor 10 — Don't Come in Last · Series: the series

Opening

All two hundred crawlers for the Pineapple Cabaret transfer along with several hundred of

Summary

Pontiff, the bull-headed Taurin and former stripper, hired as the next driver, consoles Bucket Boy in the garage: 'I would take it all back if I could […] all I can do is make amends'; Bucket Boy: 'Everyone dies in this place.' Outside, Donut, head pressed to Carl's: 'His whole family is dead or missing'; then 'is this truly the only way?' 'We’re all dying, Donut. It has to stop […] Aren’t you tired of it?' 'Of course I’m tired, but I am alive, and I’m with you.' Donut passes on Mordecai's warning: Drakea had the same setup and the Nagas cheated it into failure — 'It was all for nothing.' 'But this time the showrunners aren’t in control anymore […] he’s still following the rules.' 'You could just worship the goddess.' Eris wants devotion, not worship — a trap — 'But she did have the right idea.' The bugbears in their lawn chairs do not wave, and Carl does not; the dungeon let him use Oozy Form in the cul-de-sac and he almost wishes it had not. Florin: animal forms may go (Mordecai); Bautista leaves with Louis and Britney's consent, Tran with his spider legs, Zhang, Archie, the 101st together. Osvaldo's door stays shut; Dwight cannot drive heat six without Lucienne unless he hires. Hungry Eyes Village: five hundred people, two hundred leaving, a funeral's quiet, the guild boom box open but silent; Carl remembers the flowers at the end of Faction Wars — 'those who had dared to stay'. Louis's cookies; Bautista's clay teapots; Linus pouring for Karac, a level-62 Armchair Pacifist of brutal chainsaw kills. Bautista: 'Compared to what? Staying with you? I will take my chances' — a group bound for India. Louis: 'you can go check up on my kid'; Bautista: 'Before I go check on the child you’re having with my girlfriend.' Imani leans on Chris, skin crackling red under some new protection; 'It's good' 'Generals' — 'You only made me ‘Colonel.’' Tran in a red shirt. Donut headbutts them both. Bautista: serving friends is holy; he has found peace 'despite some of the regrettable choices I have made'; 'I know I will be recognized on the other side.' Linus, suddenly nice, has cups ready hot for Imani and Louis — Elle: 'Did you poison their tea because you’re jealous or something?' A nervous laugh. Bautista pours his own kettle instead: the guild breakfast blend infused with a vendor's leaves, a 25% constitution buff for vehicle or mount, and a different blend for the Cabaret party. The system labels it a potion; those with long countdowns must be careful; Carl says nothing — veterans, and it would be offensive to assume otherwise.

Characters

• Carl — 'We’re all dying, Donut. It has to stop'; does not wave at the bugbears.
• Princess Donut — 'Of course I’m tired, but I am alive, and I’m with you.'
• Pontiff — Hired to drive; 'all I can do is make amends.'
• Bucket Boy — 'Everyone dies in this place.'
• Radoslav and Jasha (Team Free Love) — Do not wave; something done to them by Oozy Form.
• Florin — Stays; the leavers' list.
• Daniel Bautista — Leaving for India; his breakfast blend; 'I know I will be recognized on the other side.'
• Louis and Firas — 'You can go check up on my kid.'
• Linus and Minus — Suddenly nice, with hot cups ready for Imani and Louis.
• Imani — Leans on Chris under a new protection.
• Chris — 'It's good'
• Prepotente — Demands the tea recipe.
• Tran — A red shirt.
• Li Jun and Zhang — 'You only made me ‘Colonel.’'
• Elle McGibbons — 'Did you poison their tea?'
• Osvaldo — His door stays shut.
• Eris — Wants devotion, not worship — 'the right idea'.

Locations

• The garage and the cul-de-sac — The garage; the bugbears' lawn chairs.
• Hungry Eyes Village — Five hundred people, two hundred leaving, a funeral's quiet.

Motifs

• The Pineapple Cabaret — Animal forms may go; who leaves.
• The Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook — Drakea's precedent: the Nagas cheated it.
• Plan Carl — 'This time the showrunners aren’t in control.'
• Carl's family — 'Those who had dared to stay.'
• The tourists — Linus's cups.