Character · Book 8, A Parade of Horribles

Princess Donut

GC, BWR, NW Princess Donut the Queen Anne Chonk — Bea's tortoiseshell Persian show cat, carried into the dungeon under Carl's arm. An Enhanced Pet Biscuit makes her sapient, a tiara makes her royalty, a charisma score in the forties makes her a talker of goblins and a natural on television. Crawler #4,119. Carl is, per the system, her Royal Bodyguard.

Segment appearances

• Chapter 1 — Chandra; the garage
• Chapter 2 — The wheel; a food truck
• Chapter 3 — Heat one; Prepotente's warning
• Chapter 4 — Miss Talulah; Team Free Love
• Chapter 5 — Team Sparkles; the tow
• Chapter 6 — Spider legs
• Chapter 7 — The Moon Reaper
• Chapter 8 — Hats; the Danforth; the godslayer box
• Chapter 9 — Radiant claws; the crupper's rant
• Chapter 10 — Carl's boxes; Rishi's junk
• Chapter 11 — The second cleaner bot
• Chapter 12 — The Team Roundabout; the Wild Hunt
• Chapter 13 — Lady Dominators; Corcunda; a quest
• Chapter 14 — Hungry Eyes; the Hairpin and the Lollipop
• Chapter 15 — The Lollipop: the crawlers' table
• Chapter 16 — The Paramour
• Chapter 17 — Bucket Boy at the wheel; Dr. Metcalf
• Chapter 18 — Heat two: the hail, and Team Sparkles' cannon
• Chapter 19 — One Fine Pig; Penelope
• Chapter 20 — Prison Pocket and Party Foul
• Chapter 21 — The joey skin; into the pouch
• Chapter 22 — Last place; the princess throne
• Chapter 23 — Plenty of Plenty; Zev reads the script; a note from C&W&U
• Chapter 24 — Akuma's note; half a prayer, half a song; the sock
• Chapter 25 — Fursona; Mario Kart; the hotlist
• Chapter 26 — Rend's sixth death; two ghouls
• Chapter 27 — Plenty of Plenty: Lexis in the greenroom
• Chapter 28 — The interlocution; the question Orren wanted asked
• Chapter 29 — The stampede; Harbinger
• Chapter 30 — Heat three: Gluteus Maxx and the Sugar Hermits
• Chapter 31 — Luca Di's entry; the ghoul cages; a mile of fire
• Chapter 32 — The skull of Tem; three vehicles over the line
• Chapter 33 — First place; the jungle ahead
• Chapter 34 — Team Helix
• Chapter 35 — Eris and the five-sided coin
• Chapter 36 — Jacobus, the reverse tooth fairy
• Chapter 37 — Chicken and Waffles and Upgrades; Elle and the war mage
• Chapter 38 — Akuma's account: Herot, Menerva and the Pineapple Cabaret
• Chapter 39 — The Lollipop: a needle over the singer
• Chapter 40 — Heat four: survival containment; Team Flamengo
• Chapter 41 — Forty paths; Osvaldo's crystals
• Chapter 42 — Into the jungle; Quemada breaks; the Wienermobile
• Chapter 43 — The cannibals; Great Rusty; Pasty Inferno
• Chapter 44 — Upano: the pit stop; Jamal on the ceiling; three deaths in the street
• Chapter 45 — The garage of One Fine Pig
• Chapter 46 — Glitzy Pizzazz; two traps
• Chapter 47 — Secretions; the twist; One Fine Pig eliminated
• Chapter 48 — Satan's Water Park; a corpse at the wheel
• Chapter 49 — Mehmet's page; the tubes; the trapdoor
• Chapter 50 — The River of Sloth; ginger genocide; Lucienne on the hood
• Chapter 51 — The Scavenger's Daughter blinks; Azra; heat four results
• Chapter 52 — Interlude: Minus; the key, the upgrades, and Chachi
• Chapter 53 — The key to One Fine Pig's garage
• Chapter 54 — Grigori the Placid; Zhang's only way
• Chapter 56 — Take on Me
• Chapter 57 — The brawl; Sing for your supper
• Chapter 58 — Jurgen at the door; Porky's zipper
• Chapter 59 — Negative ROI; the GTO leaves early
• Chapter 60 — Real Gs; the scarf
• Chapter 61 — Suckira; the cactus; Li Na leaves the game
• Chapter 62 — Mees Koning's page; to battle
• Chapter 63 — Receiving; the jump; Toddler Cocaine
• Chapter 64 — The hole; the dolls; Corky aboard
• Chapter 65 — Upside down: Corcunda
• Chapter 66 — Grull; Dong tilts a giant
• Chapter 67 — Half a prayer, half a song; one flower
• Chapter 68 — Sam Town; Cascadia's announcement
• Chapter 69 — The stables: who may leave; the Scavenger myth
• Chapter 70 — The memorial crystal; the Midnight Epicure
• Chapter 71 — Hungry Eyes: the goodbye; Bautista's tea
• Chapter 72 — Have You Ever Seen the Rain; Minus unmasked
• Chapter 73 — The Garden of Deliverance; the ducts
• Chapter 74 — Human shells; Ad Infinitum
• Chapter 75 — Archie's boy; Imani's family; the Feast Hive
• Chapter 76 — Apartment 231; the peach beer
• Chapter 77 — Miriam at the piano; Pony
• Chapter 78 — Damien's announcement; under a thousand
• Chapter 79 — 715 deals; Britney in Carl's mind; the Nothing in quotes
• Chapter 80 — The final heat: the lobby
• Chapter 81 — Scolopendra's first attack: the Beast of Burden Sin
• Chapter 82 — Karl the dachshund; Team Sparkles ends
• Chapter 83 — The poleaxes; Britney kills Osvaldo; the Cadillac
• Chapter 84 — The dachshund walks to the Hairpin
• Chapter 85 — The Wheel of Fortune; 'Nothing' in quotes
• Chapter 86 — Mimics; the Big Six
• Chapter 87 — Louis goes; Safehome Yolanda; the giant Imani
• Chapter 88 — Interlude: Quasar; the eleventh floor — twenty-three crawlers; Chaco's parade
• Chapter 89 — Every screen; the Tome of Gatekeeper; the Lucky Shot patch
• Chapter 90 — The Vengeance float; Carl leaves the party
• Chapter 91 — The horribles
• Chapter 92 — Chaco on Lamashtu; the AI's history in four parts; Vengeance
• Chapter 93 — The arena: 'I choose Scolopendra'
• Chapter 94 — Dungeon Boss; the pig in the harness
• Chapter 95 — Inside Scolopendra; Club Scolopendra; 'I killed him'
• Chapter 96 — Emberus explodes
• Chapter 97 — Eris; the wrong biscuit; the gods leave
• Chapter 98 — W-W-W-Winner; Mark of the Damned; the wrong biscuit
• Epilogue — Epilogue: Sydnee Iglacia, Prime Minister Victory, Louis Santiago 2

Arc

The Oak Fell's floor

She reads Chandra's papers without a word and tells the reporters what she is not offering for the snake's head (ch. 1). Assassin of Sekhmet, from a tab tied to her deity titles (ch. 1); a headdress that warns of readied spells, hats for Mongo and Rend, ten Danforth bolts (ch. 8); four radiant claws that cannot be switched off and a Claw skill of 17 — Mordecai: 'It’s from the gods, and when it comes to gods, all bets are off' (ch. 9). The Crupper of the Benevolent Champion draws the AI's first rant on one of her items (ch. 9). She kills ten thousand Sugar Hermits and does not level (ch. 32); on the tenth floor 'the game has a way of compensating for overpowered crawlers' (ch. 9).

Her floor

Her paws on the accelerator count as driving (ch. 32, ch. 33); her vote sends a slime to the arena (ch. 5); her Wall of Fire runs a mile (ch. 31); Temporary Macaroni becomes a cannelloni tunnel (ch. 32); Second Chance puts a dead toad with a caved-in head at the wheel (ch. 48); Summon Ye, Vermin kills Lucienne by accident (ch. 50); Puddle Jumper at 17 fetches Corky from a hole (ch. 64). She appoints herself Prepotente's rule-giver — no love magic (ch. 16) — talks Jamal down from the ceiling as family (ch. 44), talks Carl down at the curb (ch. 45), and gives Filipe the deal Osvaldo refused (ch. 79). Called up beside Carl to sing 'Take on Me' (ch. 56), she FAILS under a paralysed kappa: 'We are never going to mention this again' (ch. 57).

'She’s not a weapon, Carl'

When Zhang plans to kill Li Na and Carl says they need people like her, Donut answers 'She’s not a weapon, Carl. She’s a person' (ch. 54). She stops speaking to Carl when he plans to leave the party (ch. 69) and summarises his plan as an elaborate suicide (ch. 70); 'Of course I’m tired, but I am alive, and I’m with you' (ch. 71). She names the cleaner bot Ezra Fitz because he sucks (ch. 61), names a goddess Chachi for her cut-and-paste (ch. 53), and tells the giant shell of Imani the true story of her life (ch. 87). In the final heat she takes Dwight's head and horn in one swipe and crushes a Cadillac of three crawlers with Astral Paw — three skulls (ch. 82, ch. 83); with Li Na gone she is the strongest crawler in the dungeon (ch. 85). She picks the Elite Gurkha Warrior ('THE PICKLE CLASS') (ch. 88), dresses the parade in Requite Dahlias (ch. 90), shoots Katia's bolt and a Danforth into a god's eyes (ch. 96) — and, inventories swapped by Eris, hands Carl the wrong biscuit (ch. 97, ch. 98). 'I love you, too' (ch. 93).